Sex columnist Maria Yagoda’s LAID AND CONFUSED is a blend of personal narrative, research, and cultural analysis exploring why the most sex-positive generation in history is still having mediocre-to-actively-bad sex, and how the so-called « sex recession » can make space for us to discover what we truly want and what actually satisfies us.
LAID AND CONFUSED:
Why We Still Tolerate Bad Sex and How to Stop
by Maria Yagoda
St. Martin’s Press, May 2023
(via Dystel Goderich & Bourret)
Far more alarming than the “sex recession,” the phenomenon of young people having less sex than generations before them, is that we are in the middle of a bad sex epidemic that all generations are suffering from, and no one is talking about it. In the age of swiping apps and sliding into DMs, there’s still so much bad sex. Even for Maria Yagoda, a professional sex writer who gives well-researched advice on maximizing pleasure, communicating with partners, and feeling sexually confident, most sex lands somewhere between passable and “huh.” In LAID AND CONFUSED: Why We Still Tolerate Bad Sex and How to Stop, Yagoda proposes that the way out of this pickle is to embrace less sex, because less sex leads to better sex. Saying no to unsatisfying sex allows us to say yes to ourselves, to make space to discover what we truly want and what actually satisfies us. And therein lies the magic. With the blend of wit, vulnerability, and expertise that has built her an avid following, Yagoda sketches a better path forward, offering research-based insights to empower readers to say yes to less sex, reconnect with themselves, and, ultimately, craft the deeply pleasurable sex lives they deserve.
Maria Yagoda is a reporter, editor, and essayist specializing in food, sex, and culture. Her popular Vice sex column, Sex Machina, explored the intersection of sex and technology and was translated into French, Italian, Greek, and Spanish. Her writing has appeared in The Atlantic, People, Glamour, Time, Vice, The Philadelphia Inquirer, The Hairpin, BuzzFeed, and more. She lives in Brooklyn with her chihuahua Bucatina.