Archives de catégorie : Parenting

WHY WON’T YOU SLEEP? de Kim West et Gordon Macall

Sleep training didn’t work for you? You’re not the only one—and you don’t need to give up. Researcher and sleep coach Macall Gordon and the Sleep Lady Kim West offer a tried-and-true approach to shifting sleep behavior that actually works . . . even when nothing else has.

A Game-Changing Approach for Exhausted Parents of Nonstop, Super Alert, Big Feeling Kids
by Kim West & Gordon Macall
BenBella, November 2024
(via Levine Greenberg Rostan)

A tsunami of modern sleep training methods promise “easy” and “quick” results and for many parents and children, these methods work as intended. However, there is a large, exhausted group of parents whose children have sleep problems that are not responsive to those crying-based methods. These children tend to be more reactive, persistent, and perceptive than their peers. And when it comes to sleep, little ones with this kind of temperament put up a much, much bigger fight. They need a different approach. That’s where Why Won’t You Sleep? comes in. Based on extensive research and proven methods used with thousands of families just like yours, this guide gives you strategies tailored to your child’s unique temperament. Readers will learn:

  • Why popular sleep training techniques, don’t work for some children
  • Simple changes to your child’s routine and environment that prime their nervous system for slumber
  • A step-by-step plan for your child, using the time-tested approach that doesn’t require leaving babies alone to cry
  • Tips, tricks, and workarounds for night wakings, co-sleeping, and more
  • How to gently push past plateaus and setbacks

Additionally, Gordon and West provide much-needed encouragement, validation, and insights to bolster parents’ self-confidence and resilience along the way. Why Won’t You Sleep? will finally give you concrete answers to why sleep has been more challenging for you and your child—and offers a much-needed confidence boost that will leave you saying, “I’ve got this.”

Kim West, MSW, is a mom of two who has been a practicing child and family social worker for over 25 years. She has personally helped over twenty thousand families all over the world gently teach their children how to fall asleep—and fall back asleep without leaving them to cry it out alone. She started training Gentle Sleep Coaches internationally in 2010 and has appeared as a child sleep expert on numerous magazines, newspapers, and television programs including Dr. Phil, TODAY, and Good Morning America.

Macall Gordon has a master’s degree in applied psychology from Antioch University in Seattle with a research-based specialization in infant mental health, sleep advice, and parenting culture. She also has a BS in human biology from Stanford University. She is a senior lecturer in the graduate counseling psychology program at Antioch University. She has conducted and presented her own research on temperament, sleep, and parenting advice at infant and child development conferences around the world. She has been a featured speaker at national sleep conferences and has led webinar-based advanced training for sleep coaches, mental health providers, and others on the impact of temperament on sleep. She is a certified Gentle Sleep Coach (trained by Kim West) and a featured provider on the women’s telehealth platform, Maven Clinic. She comes to this work because she had two sensitive, alert, intense children, and she didn’t sleep for 18 years.


Blending history of science, cultural criticism, and memoir, THE GOOD MOTHER MYTH pulls back the curtain on the flawed social science behind our contemporary understanding of what makes a good mom.

Unlearning Our Bad Ideas About How to Be a Good Mom
by Nancy Reddy
St. Martin’s Press, January 2025

When Nancy Reddy had her first child, she found herself suddenly confronted with the ideal of a perfect mother—a woman who was constantly available, endlessly patient, and immediately invested in her child to the exclusion of all else. Nancy had been raised by a single working mother, considered herself a feminist, and was well on her way to a PhD. Why did doing motherhood “right” feel so wrong?
For answers, Nancy turned to the mid-twentieth century social scientists and psychologists whose work still forms the basis of so much of what we believe about parenting. It seems ludicrous to imagine modern moms taking advice from mid-century researchers. Yet, their bad ideas about so-called “good” motherhood have seeped so pervasively into our cultural norms. In THE GOOD MOTHER MYTH, Nancy debunks the flawed lab studies, sloppy research, and straightforward misogyny of researchers from Harry Harlow, who claimed to have discovered love by observing monkeys in his lab, to the famous Dr. Spock, whose bestselling parenting guide included just one illustration of a father interacting with his child. This timely and thought-provoking book will make you laugh, cry, and want to scream (sometimes all at once).

Nancy Reddy‘s previous books include the poetry collections Pocket Universe and Double Jinx, a winner of the National Poetry Series. With Emily Pérez, she’s co-editor of The Long Devotion: Poets Writing Motherhood. Her essays have appeared in Slate, Poets & Writers, Romper, The Millions, and elsewhere. The recipient of grants from the New Jersey State Council on the Arts and the Sustainable Arts Foundation and a Walter E. Dakin Fellowship from the Sewanee Writers’ Conference, she teaches writing at Stockton University and writes the newsletter Write More, Be Less Careful.


What really matters in parenting.

(Children Need Imperfect Parents)
by Caroline Märki and Knut Krüger
Kösel, April 2024

Perfect parenting results in perfect children? If only it were that easy. Many parents are exceedingly ambitious and want to do their job as ‘flawlessly’ as possible. But in doing so, they miss out on how much families can benefit when parents do NOT raise their children according to some standard textbook. In their book, Caroline Märki and Knut Krüger, two close confidants and companions of Jesper Juul, get to the bottom of assumedly golden parenting rules, exposing the deeply rooted but erroneous axioms and parenting myths that are hidden underneath. Notions such as ‘Parents must be consistent!’ are refuted and discarded once and for all, not only because such ideas make our lives needlessly more difficult, but also because they frequently produce misunderstandings and self-doubt.

Well-founded, entertaining, and with many examples from everyday family life, this advice book proclaims this to all mothers and fathers: You have a right to make mistakes, and children don’t need parents who are perfect. Instead, they need parents who are willing to develop along with them. Make mistakes! Dare to be imperfect. Only then will you be just right for your children: approachable, empathetic, and authentic.

Caroline Märki, born in 1971, is the founder and director of familylab Switzerland, an offshoot of the international counseling network in leadership and relationship skills based on Jesper Juul. She works as a certified psychosocial counselor SGfB, and is a parent and adult educator, as well as head of the 4-year course Experience-oriented Family Counseling.

Knut Krüger has a degree in German Studies, and has worked in bookselling and publishing. Today he is a translator, editor and freelance writer, but his heart belongs to football. He claims that, at the mini World Cup in 1974, he (Italy) scored two goals against his opponent (Argentina), but unfortunately no one can confirm it…

SIGH, SEE, START d’Alison Escalante

This unique approach empowers you with a simple parenting technique to gain confidence, remain grounded, and connect positively with your children.

How to Be the Parent Your Child Needs in a World That Won’t Stop Pushing
by Dr. Alison Escalante
Princeton Architectural Press, February 2024
(via Sterling Lord Literistic)

In this game-changing parenting book, Dr. Escalante outlines her 3-step science-based approach to escaping the ShouldStorm and embracing shouldfree mindful parenting. Going into detail about each step, she clearly explains how to implement this approach in everyday situations where parents may feel overwhelmed and shares real results from parents and children who use the technique:

SIGH: In moments of parental overwhelm, take a breath all the way into your belly. Imagine it’s a sigh of relief. Sighs help you stop and center yourself instead of reacting to the « should » in your head. SEE: Notice what’s going on. See your child. Are they happy? Are they close to tears? Are their fists balled in anger?

START: Then, and only then, start listening, and start thinking about what an appropriate reaction would be. Do they need a hug? Some space? Something else? In the vein of Good Inside, this book offers a simple approach and practical, proven strategies any parent can use. It also explores parenting culture and why it has become more and more intense over recent decades. For anyone who wants a proven toolkit for resisting a parenting culture that shames them when they can’t meet unrealistic expectations, SIGH, SEE, START is your new go-to tool for joyful parenting.

Dr. Alison Escalante is a board-certified pediatrician and an Adjunct Professor of Pediatrics at Rush University. She has been treating children for almost twenty years and has spent the last ten years exploring methods and workable solutions to target parental stress. She is a regular contributor to Psychology Today and Forbes, and her work has also been featured in Inc. and USA Today.

WHAT ARE CHILDREN FOR? d’Anastasia Berg & Rachel Wiseman

Aimed at philosophers and non-philosophers alike, this is a modern argument about the ambivalence towards childbearing and how to overcome it.

Affirming Life in an Age of Ambivalence
by Anastasia Berg & Rachel Wiseman
St. Martin’s Press, June 2024

Becoming a parent, once the expected outcome of adulthood, is increasingly viewed as a potential threat to the most basic goals and aspirations of modern life. We seek self-fulfillment; we want to liberate women to find meaning and self-worth outside the home; and we wish to protect the planet from the ravages of climate change. Weighing the pros and cons of having children, the Millennial and Gen Z generations are finding it increasingly hard to judge in its favor. WHAT ARE CHILDREN FOR? seeks to loosen the grip of the shallow narratives that either lament growing childlessness as a mark of cultural decline, or celebrate it as unambiguous evidence of social progress. Berg and Wiseman explore philosophical and cultural examples of this debate, whether from modernist writers like Virginia Woolf, second-wave feminists in the 1970s, or the current trend of dystopian novels and stories. In the tradition of Jenny Odell and Amia Srinivasan, Berg and Wiseman write with clear logic and passionate prose to offer those struggling the guidance necessary to move beyond their uncertainty. They argue that when we make the individual decision whether or not to have children we confront a profound philosophical question, that of the goodness of life itself. How can we justify perpetuating human life given the catastrophic harm and suffering of which we are always at once both victims and perpetrators? WHAT ARE CHILDREN FOR? concludes that we must embrace the fundamental goodness of human life—not only in theory, but in our everyday lives.

Anastasia Berg and Rachel Wiseman first explored these questions in an essay for The Point on choosing to have children, the rare work of philosophical inquiry to have gone viral; Berg recently discussed her own decision to pursue having a family in the context of the novel coronavirus in a widely read op-ed in the New York Times. Frequent collaborators and close friends, Anastasia Berg is currently based in Cambridge and will start as an Assistant Professor of Philosophy at the Hebrew University. She is expecting her first child. Rachel Wiseman lives in Chicago, where she is the managing editor of The Point, an award-winning nonfiction literary magazine.